This year, more than 300,000 people will be diagnosed with prostate cancer, according to the American Cancer Society. As with any life-altering disease, a diagnosis can impact the entire family, and loved ones can suddenly find themselves in a caregiver role. Whether they’re a spouse, partner, a son or a daughter, they’re now navigating unfamiliar territory with new responsibilities — and a lot of emotions.  

For those new to the caregiver role, it can be challenging to make sense of what’s happening and devise a plan for moving forward. To help, we’ve created a brief guide that includes steps to take and questions to ask, along with a reminder to always prioritize your own health, even when it’s difficult to make the time.  

1. Understand what prostate cancer is, and what treatment could entail
Talking to your loved one’s doctor is a great place to start to get specific information about the type of prostate cancer they’re dealing with and what the future may look like. Here are some helpful questions for you, or the patient, to ask:

1. • What is the stage and grade of the cancer?
   • Are you concerned it may have spread beyond the prostate?
   • What are the treatment options?
   • Are there additional tests that could be done to help decide on which treatment might be most effective?   

To continue learning about prostate cancer more broadly, seek out trusted expert resources, such as government sites, academic institutions, renowned medical organizations and non-profits such as medical research enterprises or advocacy groups. Those may include sites such as the National Cancer Institute, Mayo Clinic and  American Cancer Society.

2. Communicate openly about what your loved one wants, what he needs and next steps to take
While some people want and need support immediately when they’re diagnosed with prostate cancer, others may prefer to take charge of their own health and health care. Talk to your loved one about what kind of support will be most beneficial. Some questions to ask include:

• • Do you want me to come with you to your doctor’s appointments?
  • Do you need help establishing a system to organize medications?
  • If you need help with personal care, is that something that a family member can provide, or would you prefer a health care aide?
  • Is there paperwork or planning that you’d like me to help get in order?
  • Do you think you’d benefit from talking to a support group or a mental health professional?
  • What else can I do to support you at this time?  

3. Keep careful records
With so much going on, it’s important to write down detailed information about health care appointments, phone calls, tests and visits. It can also be helpful to start a journal and make notes about any changes to how your care partner is feeling and any new or different symptoms or reactions to medications. Also, dedicate a file or folder to the paperwork you receive from health care providers, pharmacies and insurance so it’s all in one place.

4. Take care of yourself
While serving as a person’s caregiver is an honor, it can also be a stressful responsibility. There’s even a term for the overwhelmed feelings that a caregiver can experience: caregiver burnout, which Cleveland Clinic defines as “a state of physical, emotional and mental exhaustion that happens when you’re taking care of someone else.”

While it’s not possible to remove all the stress that comes with being a caregiver, there are some steps you can take that may help you feel supported. Those include:

• • Ask for help. Make a list of the duties that you could delegate to other friends and family so that you have a response at the ready when someone offers to help. And be sure to accept help when it’s offered!
  • Be kind to yourself. Now is not the time for perfectionism. As a caregiver, do the best you can and focus on the things that are within your control.
  • Make healthy choices. When you eat a nutritious diet, exercise regularly, stay connected socially and get enough sleep you’re setting yourself up to do — and feel — your best.
  • Keep up with your own healthcare. It’s important that you stay on top of your own doctor’s appointments and screenings in order to stay healthy. Remember, you, and your partner, depend on it!