We all experience highs and lows in life. For some people, those lows could be more than just the blues. According to the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), one out of five adults and one out of six youth (ages 6 to 17) endures a mental illness each year. That could mean they’re dealing with anxiety, depression, post-traumatic stress disorder or any number of other medical conditions.

 

If you notice a change in mood, communication style or routine in someone important to you, it’s possible they might be going through a challenging time and could benefit from your support. Below, you’ll find 24 dos and don’t that may help guide you, as you strive to show up for friends and family.  

 

Do

  • Do reach out and make time to talk
  • Do find a space that’s quiet, private and distraction-free when you meet
  • Do ask questions about how they’re feeling
  • Do offer to help them out with everyday tasks
  • Do let them talk as much or as little as they wish about what they’re dealing with
  • Do validate what they’re feeling and experiencing
  • Do express your concern and let and let them know you care
  • Do encourage them to seek out professional help if they haven’t
  • Do let them know they’re not alone
  • Do educate yourself on mental health issues, and share resources if it’s appropriate
  • Do let them know you’re there for them
  • Do step back when the situation calls for it

 

Don’t

  • Don’t make comments that trivialize or make light of their feelings or experiences
  • Don’t criticize or blame them for how they’re feeling
  • Don’t pry
  • Don’t make assumptions about their feelings or actions
  • Don’t give them a pep talk, or tell them to focus on the positive
  • Don’t question the medical decisions they make
  • Don’t take it personally if they don’t respond in ways you want them to
  • Don’t make the conversation about you
  • Don’t dismiss statements about self-harm or threats about suicide — call, text or chat the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline
  • Don’t give up on them
  • Don’t forget to take care of yourself, so that you can be there for others

 

If your loved one is hurting, it’s important for them to know that help is available. That help may even begin with you. Approach them with an open mind, open heart and open ears, and let them know that there’s always hope. To learn more about mental health conditions and to get insights on treatment and support, visit NAMI.org.